Could I Outrun A Cheetah After Punching It In The Balls? A Fun Quiz For Your Survival

Art by Chicken Feet

1. Would you be willing to admit that punching a Cheetah’s penis might have been the worst idea in the fucking universe?

A. I confess to my wrongdoing… - 10 points

B. No, I don’t regret anything. - 5 points

C. Perhaps - 3 points

D. I had nothing better to do - 1 point

2. How hard can you punch?

A. I can beat Mike Tyson - 10 points

B. I don’t know… - 3 points

C. I can't punch - 1 point

3. If a Cheetah killed you, which emotion would this invoke?

A. Fear - 15 points

B. I wouldn’t give 2 shits because I am dead - 5 points

C. Anger - 3 points

D. Joy - 2 points

4. What did you eat recently?

A. Breakfast - 1 point

B. Lunch - 2 points

C. Dinner - 3 points

D. Nothing - 0 points

Results

31+: You will not ONLY be able to outrun the Cheetah, but you also put that fucker to shame. Congratulations!

30-28: You will be able to outrun the Cheetah. Congratulations!

27-18: You will probably be able to outrun the Cheetah, but don't expect it to be easy.

17-0: Oh my god. You won't be able to outrun the Cheetah, what the hell were you trying to accomplish from this.

Share your results! Could someone you know outrun a cheetah?